"For everything comes from Him and exists by His power and is intended for His Glory. All Glory to Him forever!" Romans 11:36

At what point in our lives to we stop making a list? I am a Type A personality. I love making lists and love checking things off my list even more. I have a list that probably looks a lot like most peoples. On it are all the basic steps in life I feel are best for me and our family, steps I have plotted since I was a little girl.

Meet a Godly Man- Check

Fall in Love- Check

Get Married- Check

Have a Baby #1- Check

Have a Baby #2-

Have a Baby #3 (??)-

The more I think about this list the more I realize there is nothing wrong with it- Nothing wrong with desiring these things in life. Nothing wrong with praying for God's blessing, for praying for God's graciousness, for begging night after night for these things to become your life.... The more I think about it, the more I realize.... I am missing the point. God did not call me to make a list in my life of how I think things should go. He did not say pick up your cross (and bring your list) and follow me. He did not promise me He would check things off one by one and make sure all the things I want in life happen for me.

He called us to use His list. To read his list and memorize his desires for our lives. At what point did I begin to think life was all about my list? Why do I forget how important it is to mark things off His list for me? Sometimes it's hard, I don't know what's next on the list- Sometimes, I don't even know what was on the list to begin with. I do know that God has called us to something greater than the things I think are best for my life. Why do we always get so angry when things don't go our way? We blame God for not answering our prayers and not caring about the things that are important to us. Are we so blind that we don't see how sometimes not answering our prayers IS what's best for us? I think about how we prayed every night that this baby would be healthy and this pregnancy would go smoothly. Just when I begin to question why I even pray, I realize that our prayers were answered. Maybe this pregnancy wasn't going smoothly and the baby wasn't healthy- so God answered our prayer. I think not understanding the things God does in our life makes him even more sovereign, not any less painful, but sovereign. It makes me think of when my parents would tell me "No, because I said so". It's the same thing we do with our son, we say no to things we know aren't good for him- Even though he hates it, even though he doesn't understand. We understand, and we do it because we love him.

We believe God has big plans for us. We believe he has more children in our future. I believe God has already revealed to me through this the strength, gentleness and love of my husband. The reassurance that God knit my heart to Brian's long before we ever met. The beauty in my amazing son. The incredible power that comes from loving friends and family.

Right now, we are trying to believe that God's list is way better than ours, and although we don't always know what's next to be marked off, we know if we trust Him, He will reveal it to us, in His perfect time.

God, please continue to reveal to us your power and strength. Please show us your love in ways we never imagined. Please be glorified in our lives, and please hold and adore our little baby in ways we cannot-

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us" Ephesians 3:20